First Date Night

Yay for date nights. I was giddy to go out on a date with Daniel! It had been way too long. We had not gone out the last few weeks before I had Eva cause there was so much going on and then we've been in the middle of our new transition basically passing each other in the house and saying, " oh hey, I love you," with a kiss.

Kim and Tim (Daniel's parents) had planned to come up for a teaching conference that weekend and offered for us to go out. So I fed Eva Grace, gave Addie a bath for the night and headed for the door. The clock was ticking, we had 3 hours until she would want to nurse again.

We ate at Twisted Fork, yummy! Then we headed to Starbucks of course (dessert for me). Then we remembered we needed milk (so romantic). We made a stop at the grocery store and made it home. We had a great time talking and reconnecting.

I love that man so much. I can't explain how much.

What a Big Sis

Adelyn is loving and gentle with Eva. She will ask where she is all the time. Gets an excited squeal when Eva is awake and looks at her. Calls her Eva Grace, always! Sometimes it sounds like "e grace" cause she says it so fast. Kisses her a million times a day. Tries to give her the paci if she cries. Giggles if Eva is screaming at the top of her lungs. She loves to help with bath time. I will let her hold the washcloth and rub her belly or arms. She reminds me that it's time for tummy time! She does always want to be on top of us when I'm feeding Eva so I've figured out that I have to get her involved in other things before I nurse. Also she always has to pee when I'm nursing :). So we have learned to do potty trips right before Eva eats. She has been waking up at night since we brought Eva home and it's not from the noise of Eva crying. It's always when things are quiet. We have wondered why this is but assume she is just transitioning as well.

Adelyn, you truly are an amazing big sister. You have accepted and loved your little sister so quickly. Your love an excitement for her excites me. You are so unbelievably gentle with her! I have seen the way Eva Grace already listens out for you in the room and tries to focus on you and can't wait to see you two play in the near future. Thank you for being so amazing. You will always be my sweet little Adelyn. My love for you has not changed with the addition of a new little girl. It has only gotten stronger. The Lord has blessed us!

The First 3 Weeks

Wowzers, going from 1 to 2 has been really crazy. The Lord has been gracious to us. Overall the girls have done really well, but it has definitely been an adjustment. When you have the first baby you realize how selfish you were before. Well when you have the second you just realize that you are still selfish, ha! You have to give even more of yourself and sometimes I don't know if I have it in me, but the Lord is giving me the strength ( ex: I am writing this and the clock says 4:11am).

When Eva first came home, Mom stayed for the first 2-3 nights. There is nothing like having your Mama there. She made meals for us, helped with the girls, encouraged me constantly just by being calm and upbeat. She slept on the sofa and Eva was set up to sleep in the packnplay down stairs. Mom would let us get sleep, I would set my alarm for feeding times and come downstairs to feed her. At first we did 3-4 hours even at night because we were trying hard to get her to gain weight. Within the first week she started doing 4-5 hour spans on her own.... Well where did those go, I ask?!?! Kim stayed with us from Wednesday- Saturday after she was born. It was a huge help having her there. She always makes amazing meals, she constantly played with Adelyn or held Eva and also made it possible to get out of the house some after Daniel went back to work. Her poor car got towed one day right from being parked at our front door. Silly HOA and parking pass mishap, ugh. Don't know what I would have done without Mom and Kim.

We just started our 4th week and she will do one 5 hour span starting at 8 or 9 at night but then is awake every 3 hours ( sometimes less) after that. She normally goes down pretty easily after she eats but I have to make sure I burp her well or she wakes up because of it. If her feeding time is 4:30 am or later though she is wide eyed and ready for the day. We are still working on the schedule as you can see.

She's a spitter! We didn't have this issue with Adelyn. She would do the normal small amount as she burped. Eva spits up what I feel like sometimes is all she ate. She is still having good diapers so I know that's not the case but it feels like it at times. I am eager to go to her 1 month visit next week to see how she's grown.

She has been napping pretty well if you wait until she is asleep to lay her down. She's been sleeping on the sofa, packnplay, or in her crib, most of the time swaddled in her boppy. We've been using the boppy during the day and wedge at night to keep her head elevated. I've tried the sling and Bjorn a couple times, not to excited about those yet. She is great in the car seat if the car is moving. When the car stops she Hates it! :) When she is calm she already loves laying on her changing pad and looking at the mirror or fan. She smiles a lot in her sleep but only a couple times while awake.

Baby blues: I hate even typing those words, but I figured it would be good to note down for me to remember and there may be someone else that struggles with it too and it's good to know you aren't the only one. Let me start by saying that week 3 was better than week 2 and week 4 is even becoming more normal! This is so encouraging. I started the first week thinking that it wasn't as bad as it was with Adelyn. I could go almost the whole day and not feel anxious and then it would hit me late afternoon. Then week two came. This was the deepest time of anxiety. The feeling is just: deep anxiety, heart racing, claustrophobia, emotional .... I know it has to do with your hormones that are changing and adjusting but I'm sure mine was also just the fear of all the newness. I strive on schedules, organization, cleanliness, getting out and doing things and having a newborn is the furthest thing from that. Throw a 2 year old in the mix and you have a meltdown. While Adelyn has been extremely good through this, she still requires constant attention and... Well for you to simply stay awake during the day.

Getting out of the house is always something that helps me in the beginning. I found many ways to get out even from the second day being at home. Hanging out in the porch with Adelyn doing bubbles, going for a walk, taking Adelyn to the playground or target, or ballet class while Kim or Mom had Eva at the house. After a week and 1/2 when Daniel went back to work I loaded up the two girls and went over to Moms house. We got out again at 3 weeks and went to Anna's playground and Kellie's house. I get worn out taking both of them but it helped me feel more normal. Soon we will be getting out and about like normal I'm sure.

I found something that helped me tremendously during this time. After Eva Grace's birth I found this on a great blog that I follow http://www.girltalkhome.com/blog/Postpartum_Depression...I sent all of these blog posts to my email so that at anytime I could pick them up and read them on my phone. The two biggest encouragments to me during this have been to keep praise music playing in the living room and to constantly have my mind focused on scripture and on the fact that I won't feel this way long. Oh and sunshine! For some reason still the time I feel most anxious or weird is when I lay Adelyn down for a nap. I don't know if it because the house is so quiet or because I miss her? It seems like this would be my most relaxed time. I know that I have to take a nap and not clean so my routine that has helped is laying Addie down, clean up big messes quickly, make a spot for me and Eva in the sofa, put something quiet in the tv, and nap with Eva. Even if I'm only able to sleep 20 minutes, it helps.

Daniel and I have been doing well. We have our moments of frustration, but he is such an amazing helper and friend. We have had to make it a point to try to spend one on one time together, even if it's 15 minutes before we crash at night. We are both exhausted but we both smile at each other and say, " but we know it's worth it."

I want to also say that even with all of the anxiety... There have been good sweet moments. I don't mean to make it all sound negative. The Lord has already carried me through so much and has given me joy. I was forced to rely on Him.

Isaiah 41:10: Do not fear, for I am with you; do not be dismayed for I am your God. I will strengthen you and help you; I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.

2 Corinthians 12:9: My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.

Matthew 6:34: Do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself. Each day has enough trouble of its own. [Also see Matthew 6:25-34.]

Proverbs 3:5-6 Trust in the Lord with all your heart, and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways acknowledge him, and he will make your paths straight.

Psalm 139:1-3: O Lord, you have searched me and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with my ways.

Isaiah 26:3-4: You will keep in perfect peace him whose mind is steadfast, because he trusts in you. Trust in the Lord forever, for the Lord, the Lord, is the Rock eternal.

Philippians 4:6-7: Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, by prayer and petition, with thanksgiving, present your requests to God. And the peace of God, which transcends all understanding, will guard your hearts and minds in Christ Jesus.

Eva's Birth Story

Here is the VERY long birth story. Sorry for all of the details, but I wanted to be able to remember everything. :)

 February 21 Tuesday morning contractions 3:30-6:30am. 

February 22 Wednesday 10:30-6:30 contractions some were 10 minutes apart. Daniel helped me breath through these, tried to sleep in between them, called doctor at 4am ( Dr. Inge) he said to wait until they are 6-7 minutes apart. He said that we could come to our doctors appointment when the office opened at 8am to get checked if we wanted. 

Daniel had 2 really important meetings that morning. Called mom at 7am and the contractions had stopped of course but Barry and Kaye came to help me to the doctor for our regular visit. Adelyn came as well. I was 3cm and thinning.  I went back to the room thinking Adelyn would have more fun sitting with Barry and Kaye in the waiting room, but when I came out she asked if we were gong to hear the baby's heartbeat and I told her I just had. She started to cry and was upset that she didn't get to hear it. I was heart broken. It was sweet that she enjoyed it so much and I didn't even think that she would care. She had been with me to all of the previous visits and looked forward to the appointments. This was also the day of my sweet Granny Smith's funeral and I was so interested to see what was going to happen. I did not want to miss her funeral but more than that I didn't want Mom and Dad to miss it! It was a crazy morning. 

I had a couple of contractions on the way home from the doctor. I didn't have any regular contractions until around 10:30am. They started getting more intense but really far apart. Daniel got home around 11:30am and the contractions started getting really strong (10-15 min apart). Kaye was timing them. Adelyn was watching Enchanted movie and we made her lunch. 

 Daniel was home and we were trying to decide whether I could make it to the funeral. I decided I wanted to try. I had already taken a shower and fixed my hair right after the doctors appointment just in case. So I threw on a dress and we called our friend Anna. She had offered to come get Adelyn to watch her for a little bit. Adelyn was excited to go play with Everett. 

We drove to the funeral, I only had one strong contraction on the way. We arrived at the funeral with ten minutes to spare. We found the family and sat with them. I had about 5 strong contractions during the funeral. I had to hold Daniel's hand and had to breath through them. Every time I would get really emotional I would have a really strong contraction. We left the funeral and decided not to go to the graveside because my pain was getting stronger.  We called to check on Adelyn and she was napping with plans of going the park once her and Everett woke up. Thanks to the Bishops for keeping her. 

Daniel and I had a few minutes of special alone time at home. We tried to nap a little and just hung out. He went to pick Adelyn up around dinner time. Then mom and dad came over to our house after the graveside and dinner at church with the family to wait out the contractions and to help with Adelyn.  I was up and down off of the sofa. Mom kept suggesting that I keep moving around the house if I wanted them to get closer together. So I did some dishes, some laundry and the just paced in the living room. Of course our bags had been fully packed for about a day now because of my earlier contractions. Adelyn surprisingly seemed kind of oblivious to the fact that I was in pain and breathing weird:). 

The contractions were steadily at 10 min apart and sometimes 6-8 min. We hopped in the car around 9 right after we put Adelyn to bed. Headed to Rex, called doctor (Dr. Wind). She said she didn't think I was in true labor, she wouldn't admit me, probably braxton hicks, probably no more than 4.5 dilated. My bubble was burst. We turned around (against mom's suggestion) and came back home. 

We waited 1 more hour, had bloody discharge, contractions were more intense but no closer together. I was having a hard time breathing through them. Once a few of them were 6-8 minutes apart we went ahead and left because the pain started to wrap around my back and butt. This was around 11pm.

We didn't call the doctor this time, and parked close by in regular parking and walked. I had just started to have the shakes and my legs were getting weak as we walked, so I was hoping we were close. We walked in and the security guy sent us straight up to the check in waiting area. The sweetest L&D nurse came right to meet us when we sat down. Her name was Amber. I remembered her from when Lois was born (Kel had the same nurse). She was so kind, gentle, comforting and confident. She brought us back to triage, and started asking questions. I had a strong contraction right then and she said, let me check you really quick and we can ask these questions later. She checked and I was at 7 cm!!!! Daniel and I looked at each other and smiled. She started asking another girl to get an IV ready. I asked if that meant they were admitting us, she said " oh yes, your not going anywhere. You will probably have this baby by 2 or 3 am." Daniel and I, again kept smiling. We were so happy that this was it! She moved me into a room right away, another girl came in to do my IV and draw blood. I had to have blood drawn before I got the epidural. Daniel stopped for a second and called/text my parents and his parents to let them know that this was it. Mom and Dad were at our house. We had put Adelyn down for the night and they were sleeping on and off downstairs. They decided to take Adelyn over to Kellie and Micah's house to sleep in Zoe's bed because Zoe was staying the night with Max and Kaye. Micah would watch out for Adelyn and Kellie would come to the hospital with Mom and Dad. 

They wheeled me into the labor and delivery room. I remember it was really warm in there and I asked them if they could turn on the air. The nurse immediately came in and drew my blood and started my IV. The L&D nurse was on my right hooking up the monitors to my belly and Daniel was on my left helping me through the contractions. Kaye and Barry were the first to arrive for support. They came in the room with us and got to see me experience some of my most intense contractions before I received the epidural. The L&D nurse said that my blood work was taking a little longer to come back than normal and she kept checking on the status. It seemed like an eternity to me but I wasn't quite desperate yet. Finally they got the go ahead for the epidural around  (more on that later) and the anesthesiologist came in right at the end of one of my contractions. They were still 8-10 minutes apart so he was able to give me the epidural during a contraction. I told Daniel that I didn't know if I liked that better or not because I was able to feel everything that he was doing. The epidural started working after only 5 minutes. It was amazing. I felt like I could finally rest a little. We kinda got settled in the room. Daniel started some music at that time I think and Mom, Dad and Kellie visited us in the room. Now for the scary part: 30 min after the epidural it was just Daniel and Me in the room and I started feeling nauseous, my vision started turning black, my hearing started getting funky like i was plugging my ears. So I asked Daniel to hit the button for the nurse. She came right in and knew exactly what was going on. She grabbed a medicine from in the room and put it right into my IV. It immediately made my vision come back and my hearing clear up. I felt totally better. She said that my blood pressure dropped and that it was a side effect of the epidural. I was able to sleep for a little while and then it happened one more time. The anesthesiologist came in to check on me because they had to give me the medication again and turn me on my side. He said that if it happened again that they would have to cut my epidural in half. All I could think was, NO, Lord please don't let that happen!:) I remember I asked Mom to come up at one point and she was sitting beside me while my blood pressure was all crazy. She was holding my hand and I remember her looking down at her phone texting Dad (or someone) to pray. 

After that fiasco we were able to rest from about 4am-6am. The nurse turned the lights off. I remember I was able to sleep well but slightly woke up every time the blood pressure cuff would check my blood pressure. They had to monitor it every 15 minutes to make sure things were still going okay. Daniel was asleep in the "super comfy" fold out chair next to me. She came in during that time and turned up my pitocin some more and said that they would check me again at 6am. From 5:30am - 6 I couldn't sleep anymore because I was getting excited. I was starting to feel slight pressure and knew that it would not be long. I was texting Kellie (who was sitting down stairs) because I was bored and didn't want to wake Daniel up. She came in at 6am to check me and I was fully dilated and ready to push. She got a few things set up in the room and turned on the all the lights. She had me do a couple practice pushes and she said, "okay I am going to call the doctor now". She paged the doctor and then had me do a couple more pushes. She then instructed me to stop and paged the doctor again. She had me put my legs down because Eva was about to  be born without the doctor in the room. I did NOT like waiting like that. I could feel the pressure so strong (but no pain thank goodness). I felt like my hips couldn't take any more pressure. She then called the doctor for a 3rd time!!!

 As soon as Dr. Wind walked in they had me push a couple times and she was born at 6:31am! As soon as her head was out she had a strong cry. Daniel cut the umbilical cord. They put her right on my chest. She was so sweet and so beautiful. She looked a lot like sweet Adelyn as a newborn but with more dark hair. I could not believe we were doing this for a second time. You wonder where the love and feelings will come from for this second sweet little girl. How will she be different? How much does she weigh? Is she okay? She sounded strong to us but since she was 10 days early we wanted to hear them say that she was doing fine. They took her away after a little while to clean and weigh her. They announced that she weighed 5lbs and 13 ounces. The doctor said that she was small but sassy. :) 

They cleaned me up while they did all of her testing. We then sent down word for Mom and Dad to come up. Tim and Kim had not arrived yet. I pretty sure that Kellie and Jessica came up at this time as well. So happy that Jessica was able to be present for Eva's birth (she was in Argentina when Adelyn was born). We had some more family come visit us in the room for a few minutes and then they said it was time to transition us to our regular room. I felt really good at this time, just really hungry! 

Big sister gets to meet Eva Grace post to follow... 

Eva Grace

Our sweet Eva Grace is here! 

February 24, 2012 

5lbs 13oz

6:31am

Birth story soon to follow!